Sunday, October 3, 2010

State Mottos, Again!

OK Class, it's time we took a look at the States of the Union again.

AL: We do a lot of Southern stuff here and we're comfortable with most of it.
AK: Hey, after the Polar Shift in 2012, all this will be a tropical paradise.
AZ: We can fry eggs on our sidewalks. In January.
AR: We disavow any affiliation with Kansas.
CA: Our biggest export is a product called Weird.
CT: The bedroom state for NYC.
DE: We're the first ones to ratify the Constitution. Haven't done much since, but at least we have THAT.
FL: All the heat and humidity of Hawaii, but without the scenery or all those pesky volcanos
GA: We have "hick" down to an artform.
HI: Our state motto is, "Ua mau ke ea o ka aina i ka pono". We use more vowels than any other state. FTW!
ID: We're more than just potatoes. When we figure out just what, we'll let you know.
IL: The French colonized us a long time ago. We've gotten over that, can't you?
IN: We're in the Midwest. What does actually mean?!
IA: Corn. Soy. Corn. Soy. Corn. Soy. That about covers it.
KS: Sorta ticked at Arkansas for using our name without permission. Oh, there'll be a court hearing on this, believe you me.
KY: Keeping Western Appalachian traditions alive, one still at a time.
LA: We have Jazz here. Oh, and malaria, but let's focus on Jazz, OK?
ME: Guardians of the Northeast corner. Keeping a close eye on that shady Nova Scotia.
MD: Our state name is Maryland and our capitol is Annapolis. The girls run this state, geez.
MA: If it wasn't for Cape Cod sticking out there like that, you'd probably never find us.
MI: Don't talk to us about Detroit, alright? We're getting treatment for that.
MN: We're all the way up here in the attic.
MS: After a while, our state name just looks like a typo.
MO: We're the "Show Me" state. Just... don't show me that. Or that. Oh, COME ON! Not that either! GAA!
MT: Where the Wild West gets a little crazy, too.
NE: We're one of the easiest pieces in that little US puzzle you had when you were a kid.
NV: Aw, what the heck. We'll just legalize everything.
NH: Look, when the presidential candidates would come here to campaign, it was cute... at first. Now, well...
NJ: We've got so much attitude, we're going to start to tax it.
NM: Not saying it's dry here, but we can make buildings out of mud and not worry about them washing away.
NY: I think we could fit one or two more people on Manhattan. Come on, people, scootch in closer.
NC: Hey, Virginia and us, we're tight.
ND: Our state capitol is named after a sort of doughnut. Gads, that's embarrassing.
OH: Our state motto is, "With God, all things are possible". Much better than the first idea: "Slag heap of the U.S."
OR: Where the Pacific has been been beating the crap out of us for a long time.
PA: We have a city that sits on an underground fire that's been raging since 1962. How awesome is that?!
RI: We recently took the entire population of the state on a field trip to the Bronx Zoo. We had popcorn, too.
SC: Don't let the name fool you, we're also a little to the West, too.
SD: Boring came here and died of boredom. That's gotta suck.
TN: If you look at it right, the state sorta looks like a Lego block.
TX: We have bigger things here. Bet you didn't know that cuz we're quiet about stuff like that.
UT: Great Salt Lake. Alright, fine, it should be Great Salt Unlake, but let's not be difficult.
VT: We're the symbiotic twin to New Hampshire. Groovy.
VA: Hey! Careful how you say "Norfolk", Yankee!
WA: It's a rain forest, People! Of COURSE it's going to rain here!
WI: It all boils down to whether or not you love the Packers.
WY: Oh, come ON! Rhode Island has two times more people than we do! That's just weird.

1 comment:


    MN, MD, NV, ND, TN, TX made me LOL!! (So did you saying FTW! :D)

    WI, SD, IA, CA, FL TRUTH!!